Tiki-taka is dead.

Real Madrid dancing on Tiki-taka's grave - Allianz Area, 29th April 2014

We were told it's the most beautiful way to play, adored by pundits and fans the world over, as it appeared to be the flick-of-a-wand that magicked Spain's fairy tale happy endings at three international tournaments in a row, as well as supplying Barcelona's domination of La Liga, the Champions League, and of course most importantly, possession.

And we all believed it, at least for a little while. I for one found my self applauding the amount of passes the likes of Busquets were completing, according to Sky Sports' graphics with a little 'courtesy of OptaStats' in the corner. But why? What's so 'beautiful' about various dark haired Spaniards rolling a ball sideways and backwards to each other around two thirds of a football pitch? Was Tiki-taka ever really the breathtaking phenom that drooling pundits such as Redknapp, Neville and random BBC World Cup guests Adebayor and Seedorf made it out to be? I'm starting to think it was just a fancy name for 'pass and move.'

This doesn't require a caption

According to many in Spain, and also Wikipedia, the origins of the method seem to have been born in the virtuoso brain of Ajax, Barca, Holland and general football legend, Johan Cruyff. Cruyff himself was part of the Ajax and Dutch sides famous for creating their own 'tactic so good it must be given it's own name,' ie, Total Football. But the obsession with possession we see at the highest level today has changed somewhat, particularly in recent years as the professors of Tika-taka-ology (the study of Tiki-taka), have had to conjure up plans to tweak and expand the format, so it's possible to overcome all opposition, and not just those gullible enough to close down every individual pass until the Tika-taka-ettes have found their way onto the exciting side of the other team's back four.

FC Barcelona - Best Teamplay Goals - 2011/Opposition gullible enough to close down every individual pass until the Tika-taka-ettes have found their way onto the exciting side of the other team's back four.

The tactic should be about keeping the ball through quick passes, sharp off the ball movements which throw the opposition all over the place before an outstanding scooped pass to a clinical striker, results in yet another goal.

Lionel Messi - Best Passes/Sharp off the ball movements which throw the opposition all over the place before an outstanding scooped pass to a clinical striker, results in yet another goal.

Boring.

However, it's turned into a keep-the-ball-by-any-means operation, rarely resulting in positive passes and has become more useful in preventing the opponent from scoring, rather the Tika-tak-ing side making the net bulge. Spain's sacrificing of a striker in recent years epitomised this trend, with Cesc Fabregas, once a slightly defensive midfielder, so much so he wore the number 4 shirt, strolling out in a 'false 9' role, which is effectively a player who should be playing up front, leading the line, instead dropping back into midfield to do nothing more than, you guessed it, retain possession. Pep Guardiola, a serial 'possession-aholic' fell in love with the idea, turning Messi into a false 9 at times for the Barca team which used to be widely regarded as the best team to watch on the planet, before Tiki-taka turned them into a bunch of psychotics, who only care about the ball and aren't willing to share with the opposition. 

Yet it's main weakness, and 'nail in the Tiki-taka-coffin,' is the emergence of tactics to counter it, and in some cases 'counter' is very much the correct term. 

Let's go back to 2010, the philosophy was at its height. Spain, the canvas on which the Tiki-taka masterpiece was to be exhibited to the world, on the greatest platform of them all, the World Cup. And, with Euro 2008 already in the bag, they were going to walk it, quite literally considering the tempo of their play. They lose their opening match to Switzerland. The Swiss only have 33% possession but use it to launch direct, pacey attacks, and get into Spain's defensive third quicker than Xavi and Iniesta can say: "¡Dar a la pelota!" (Give the ball back.) Not only this, but due to the bizarre situation the Spanish defenders find themselves in, that is having to actually defend, they appear flustered and all over the place like the hair of Carles Puyol, himself, resulting in a number of goal mouth scrambles and eventually a 'scrappy-as-you-like' goal from Man City flop, Gelson Fernandes.

More recently, Guardiola's Bayen Munich team of 'Tiki-taka-converts' have been criticised for being boring this season, despite a record in the Bundesliga made up of several 'Ws', many of which are all in perfect succession. Yet, in their biggest game of the season, Real Madrid shunned their Tiki-taka and tiki-took the piss out of them, shutting them out at the Bernabeau and nicking a Benzema goal on the break, before whacking them 0-4 at the most red of Allianz Arenas you'll ever see, with again chances coming on the break. But protecting Casillas, and playing direct was far from boring. Direct football doesn't just come in the flavour of Tony Pulis or Sam Allardyce, when blended with the attacking qualities of Ronaldo and Bale of Real or Suarez and Sturridge of Liverpool rather than Kevin Davies and Nolan from Bolton Wanderers' 'Glory Years', direct football is a recipe for entertainment.

Professor Guardiola has a PHD in Tiki-taka-ology

Finally, if tactics to counter Tiki-taka are the nails in the coffin, how exactly did it die? Well, as ugly and distressing as it sounds, the formerly most exciting, gracious, majestic football philosophy of recent years, was violently ran over by a metaphorical bus, driven by Josè Mourinho. Ever the scurge of Barca, the man I refuse to refer to as 'The Special One' has got the better of teams with an unhealthy need for possession several times, and has done so with such effectiveness that I see no reason why it can't work every time. Arguably this years most overused and most annoying clichè; 'Parking the Bus,' used to be known more poetically and exotically as 'Catenaccio,' and consists of a team focusing almost primarily on defence, and not letting any little Tika-tak-ing bastards through. Instead, staying compact and patient off the ball makes the opponent panic as the game progresses without breakthrough, causing them to result to long shots and crosses which can only be merely described by commentators as 'hopeful.' Not only does it seem consistently effective, but as Brendan Rodgers' recently claimed it's not hard to coach. So surely we can expect mediocre sides such as Granada in La Liga, SC Freiburg in the Bundesliga, Stoke in the Premier League and Hapoel Jerusalem of the Israeli Second Division, shutting out the more technically gifted sides on a weekly basis and putting an end not just to Tika-taka, but to the myth that possession is 'nine tenths of the law,' when in reality it's probably not even one third of it.